Sunday, March 15, 2026New Newmanton, U.S. CommonwealthVol. CXV · No. 3642

The New Newmanton News

“Democracy That Doesn't Upset Billionaires”

Bradley Poust

A case of Labatt Blue riddled with bullet-holes sits on a hay bale in a still from Kid Rock's video, posted Tuesday.

Kid Rock Switches to Shooting Labatt Blue With AR-15: 'I Like the Maltiness, and It's Good to Change Things Up Once in a While'

Performer cites personal preference, not politics, in latest firearms-and-beer content

By James Okonkwo · Mar 11, 2026

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A framed photograph of Theodore Wambolt at the Meridian Assurance Group holiday party, 2022, displayed in the office lobby on Monday.

Theodore 'Ted' Wambolt, 46, Claims Adjuster Dies After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

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By Philippa Trask · Mar 8, 2026

Graham Holt at his desk in the TNNN offices, photographed Tuesday.

Who, Exactly, Is Being Harmed by This Conversation?

A classical liberal asks the question no one else will, because no one else has the courage, or possibly the patience

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Influencer Markets Sinkhole Dirt as Cure for 'Learned Male Submissiveness'; Product Ships Nationwide

Third Street soil, described by Public Works as 'of uncertain composition,' now available in capsule form at $34.99 per month

By James Okonkwo · Mar 4, 2026

Brittany Oliaro and Todd Fendrick at the Gnu Botanical Conservatory on Saturday, having determined that this was information the public required.

Fendrick-Oliaro Wedding Announced in Newspaper, No One Cares

Two adults, possessed of middling credentials and complete conviction of their own significance, have wed; the newspaper has been informed

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