Fendrick-Oliaro Wedding Announced in Newspaper, No One Cares
Two adults, possessed of middling credentials and complete conviction of their own significance, have wed; the newspaper has been informed
By Claire Beaulieu
Sunday, March 8, 2026

Brittany Oliaro and Todd Fendrick were married on Saturday evening at the Gnu Botanical Conservatory's Fernwood Pavilion — a glass-ceilinged event space that has hosted, by the facility's own count, 'hundreds of meaningful gatherings' — in a ceremony officiated by the Rev. Douglas Pell, an ordained minister of the Universal Life Church who completed his certification online in approximately four minutes in 2019 and who has since officiated eleven weddings, three of which he describes on his personal website as 'genuinely moving.' The ceremony began seven minutes late.
Ms. Oliaro, 31, is a senior account coordinator at Briarwood Strategic Communications, a firm that specializes in 'narrative solutions for growth-stage brands,' a phrase that appears on the firm's website without further explanation. She graduated from the University of New Newmanton with a Bachelor of Science in communications, with a concentration in digital engagement strategy, in 2015. Her father, Dennis Oliaro, is a retired assistant branch manager at New Newmanton Community Credit Union and a 2002 recipient of the Rotary Club of Gnu's Civic Participation Certificate. Her mother, Pam Oliaro, formerly Pam Derrick, attended two years of community college and is, in the words of the wedding program, 'a beloved homemaker and occasional substitute cafeteria coordinator for the New Newmanton Unified School District.' Mr. Fendrick, 33, is a project manager at Apex Workflow Solutions, where he oversees the implementation of enterprise software platforms for clients he is not at liberty to name due to confidentiality agreements he regards as a mark of professional distinction. He graduated from Coastal Pines College in 2013 with a degree in business administration. His father, Gary Fendrick, is a licensed home inspector and the current vice president of the New Newmanton Regional Home Inspection Association, a position he has held since 2021 following an uncontested election. His mother, Susan Fendrick, manages the front desk at a dermatology practice in the Harbor District and is described by colleagues as 'always on top of things.'
The couple met in 2022 when they were both attendees of a happy hour hosted by the Young Professionals of New Newmanton at Plimpton's Pub & Provisions, where they discovered, over the course of approximately forty minutes and two rounds of domestic beer, that they had mutual friends, similar feelings about 'not really being into drama,' and overlapping opinions on the superiority of the harbor-view apartments in the Terraces. 'It just felt right,' Ms. Oliaro said. 'Like, from the beginning, it was just easy.' Mr. Fendrick confirmed that it had been easy. The reception, held in the Conservatory's adjacent Magnolia Room, featured a DJ who performed under the name DJ Momentum and a buffet dinner that included both a carving station and what the catering director called 'a robust salad situation.' Guests were invited to sign a wooden plank with a paint pen, a tradition the couple described as 'a little rustic, a little us.' The couple will honeymoon in Cancún before returning to their two-bedroom apartment, where they will continue to live.
