A new outbreak of what Mayor Clifton Reeves has characterized as the Woke Mind Virus has resulted in 53 New Newmanton residents securing full-time employment and an additional 33 receiving universal healthcare coverage since Thursday, according to figures released by the city's Office of Public Health, which the mayor established by executive order Friday morning for the purpose of releasing these figures.

MAYOR'S RESPONSE

Reeves, speaking at a press conference in the lobby of City Hall, called the outbreak "a direct attack on the prosperity and freedom of this commonwealth" and said his administration was "doing everything in its power to ensure that no further residents are employed or medically covered against their will."

"These are real people. Real New Newmantonians with jobs and health insurance. We cannot allow that to stand."

TRACING THE SOURCE

Public health officials believe the current outbreak is traceable to the Founders' Square incident of last week, in which Dr. Lena Kahale of the Gnu Nation Cultural Council distributed pamphlets near the Newton Monument before delivering an anti-colonial argument that four immigration enforcement officers did not survive. The pamphlets, which outlined the Tahumake people's historical land claims alongside a community job placement program and a proposal for island-wide healthcare coverage, are believed to have circulated beyond the square before City Clerk Patricia Voss could update the relevant permits.

"The argument had good transitions," said one resident, who asked not to be named and who, as of Tuesday, holds a benefits-eligible position at a Harbor District logistics firm. "I read the pamphlet twice. I don't know what happened after that."

The mayor said his administration was conducting a full epidemiological review and that steps would be taken to ensure residents were "not exposed to that kind of material without proper inoculation, which we are developing." He did not specify what the inoculation would consist of but said it would be "strong, very strong, probably the strongest in the country," and took credit for the current staffing levels of the Office of Public Health, which he had created forty-eight hours prior.

As of press time, the number of newly employed residents had risen to 57.